Jesus Redefined Family — and It Changes Everything

Pastor Pat opens with what Hawaii taught him about family: the word hanai, a mom or son or nephew you are not related to by blood. A friend told him, “Next time you come you’re family,” so he should never ask before going into the fridge. At a family reunion on the North Shore, beautiful Hawaiian names were chanted, until they reached “Patrick Riley McFall.” Family can be welcoming and expansive, he says, and it can also be painful.

In Matthew 12, Jesus has offended almost everyone. Then his mother and brothers show up outside, wanting to speak to him. Mark 3 tells us why: they thought he had lost his mind and came to take charge of him. Pat says Jesus understands family pressure. Respect for elders is biblical, but even Mary’s best effort to care for her son would have kept him from what his Father asked. Pat shares that his own family name was Easter until his grandfather, raised in an orphanage during the Great Depression, took the name McFall. Pressures pass down through families about careers, raising kids and where to spend the holidays. Yet on the last day, he says, we will each stand before God for what we did with his Son.

Matthew was writing for believers who had lost their families to follow Jesus, and Jesus opens the tent. With an open hand toward his disciples, he says these are his mother and brothers. Matthew repeats “mother and brothers” again and again while the biological family stands outside. Jesus adds “sister,” in a world where women could not study the Torah or serve as witnesses. He leaves out “father,” because “we don’t share a family tree, we share a father.”

Belonging comes by doing the Father’s will. That is not salvation by works: obedience is the evidence of grace. Jesus still cared for his mother from the cross. Sincerity alone does not make someone family; the way is through Jesus and the narrow gate.

How do we do God’s will? First, hear. Make God’s Word the primary voice, and learn to sit in silence instead of reaching for instant answers. Then do it. Pat jokes that if God didn’t tell you to say it, you should probably keep quiet. God’s will is not a mystery for a few spiritual people: love God, love people and make disciples, at any age. The message ends with communion and an invitation to come home to God’s family.